One Two Three Four I Declare a Chicken War

 VS.

Choose Your Chicken Wisely, Good Citizens!

Look, it’s not like my name is Stan and there’s some Wendy Testaburger out there who I’m trying to impress by being all political and stuff. When I blog about politics, it normally leaves a bad taste in my mouth. You might learn something about me you didn’t care to know and I might learn something about you I didn’t care to know. And then it’s awkward talkin’ for awhile. I’ve tried to avoid taking a side in the recent Chick-fil-A debate. To be honest, I always liked their food and I didn’t understand what one lunatic exec’s political views had to do with that food and the locally owned franchises in my area. But I can’t stand idly by anymore…and here’s why.

Lemme tell you a little story about what happened to me last night. Driving home from a hard day’s work, I was cravin’ some Chick-fil-A as I often do. So I decided to stop on by, and I honestly thought all the recent boycott talk might’ve hurt business and I would be able to conveniently race through the drive-thru in record time. It was all about me, see? What I found was a line around the block and a long wait for some extra-lousy, fatty, greasy, poorly breaded nuggets and soggy waffle fries. Eating the nasty grub at home, I thought, “What the hell?” And then I saw it on the news – Yup! – I unwittingly participated in the hate-laced, Huckabee & Palin-endorsed “Support Chick-fil-A Day.” I became sick to my stomach for multiple reasons. Continue reading

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State of the Union Drinking Game V. 2010

"Look...guys, relax...you know I still got this....right?"

Hope…where have ye gone?  Back to Arkansas?  Did you take the Laughter with you, Hope?  Were you shot in the face at the Crawford Ranch?  I sure do miss the good ol’ days of Bubba…and Dubya…when we could all laugh our problems away. 

I wrestled for a long time with putting up a drinking game for the 2010 State of the Union which will air live this Wednesday night, January 27th at 9pm EST. 

The ‘Spin has come a long way from the days of playing “Bush or Chimp” during past States of the Union. 

I feel maybe I’ve grown up some in the past few years…or maybe the country has.  Or maybe politics just aren’t funny these days.  There’s not much to laugh about with an economy still in shambles, wars still ongoing, Tea Parties gaining traction and a non-functioning and totally inept Congress that can’t get anything done. 

But I’d be a fool to overlook the fact that when my 2008 Presidential Debate Drinking Game appeared as a top link on The Huffington Post website, it was the first time The Schleicher Spin was put on the map.  To this day, despite all my literary and film-based blathering, that ridiculous thing remains my most popular post ever.

So, what the hell…if this is the new Great Depression…then consider Prohibition repealed, and let’s make COCO proud… Continue reading