Twin Peaks – The Return: Complete Hour by Hour Guide

NOTE TO READERS – These weekly posts are meant to recap what happened (SPOILERS AHEAD) and provide conversation starters for fans to comment and share theories. Do not read if you have not watched this week’s hour(s) yet.

HOUR NINE

“When did he lose his marbles?”

At one point in hour nine, Diane (annoyed to be dragged to Buckhorn by Gordon Cole to see the alleged body of Major Briggs) receives a text that says, in riddle-like fashion from someone unknown, “Around the dinner table the conversation is lively.”

That about describes this hour…full of lively talk (and some great Albert one-liners) that deepens the mystery with plenty of clues but doesn’t give us anything juicy that astute Twin Peaks cultists haven’t already deduced.  There’s a lot of mumbo-jumbo about coordinates that may or may not open up portals into other dimensions:  Major Briggs left behind a secret scroll only his son Bobby (Dana Ashbrook) could extract from a mysterious tube with coordinates (and the “Cooper, Cooper” chant Briggs revealed to Cooper while they were camping in the woods in Season Two shortly before Briggs disappeared in a UFO-abduction-type scenario); while in Buckhorn, Ruth Davenport murder suspect and apparent alternate-dimension blogger William Hastings (a delightfully whiny Matthew Lillard) rambles to Tammy about meeting “The Major” and being given secret coordinates before The Major said “Cooper, Cooper” and floated up into the sky.

We also have this hour:

• Bad Coop still seemingly himself (even after all that woodsman hobo shaman crap last week), ordering a hit on the Warden who just released him, and learning that Dougie has stubbornly survived all multiple attempts on his life.
• Dougie’s lack of a record before 1997 puzzling the Vegas cop brigade, who deduce maybe he’s in Witness Protection before heading out to the party to take in Ike the Spike.
• Andy and Lucy arguing over the color of a new chair (presumably for their new study).
• Jerry Horne still lost in the woods, unable to move because his thinks his own foot is not his own foot.
• Johnny Horne seriously injuring himself at home (perhaps a precursor to his sister Audrey’s return).
• Ben Horne showing some uncharacteristic restraint with Beverly while still searching for the source of that otherworldly and mesmerizing hum at the Great Northern.
• And finally some strung-out girls hanging out the Roadhouse, one of them with a hell of a rash.

Well…until next week…

Commentary by David H. Schleicher

What say you, fellow Peakers? What were your favorite clues revealed in Hour Nine?