Live from New York on Any Given Saturday Night

I’m a bit late to the game as the Saturday Night Live 40th Anniversary Special aired on NBC this past Sunday, but watching the three-hour trip down memory lane got me thinking between the laughs.  It’s amazing how much SNL has been and continues to be part of my routine.  I was still in single digits when I watched the early seasons rerun on Nick@Nite, and it was during the Farley heyday when the teen version of me became a committed live watcher.  The current season may be abysmal (only the absurdly funny “Wishin’ Boot” music video deserves repeat play), but the special reminded me how funny SNL can be and left me reminiscing about my favorite sketches over the years.

This is by no means a comprehensive list, but more of an invitation for you, dear readers, to share your favorite SNL sketches.

SNL - Bag O Glass

As far as “one-and-done” stand-alone pieces, nothing in my mind tops “Consumer Report” where Dan Aykroyd plays a slimy toys salesman shucking new toys for the Christmas season, one of which is a literal bag of broken glass.  Continue reading

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The Top Ten Will Ferrell Movies

This December, the most anticipated “long-awaited” sequel in film history since The Godfather Part III, will finally be here.

Anchorman 2 - Joke Poster

In honor of Anchorman 2’s upcoming release, I invite my idiot and learned readers alike to name their favorite films from uber-funny and 21st-century absurdist satirical mastermind, Will Ferrell.

Here are The Spin’s Top Ten picks –

  1. Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby (2006) – Shake & Bake, Dear Lord Baby Jesus and Rickeeee Bobeee.  This was Ferrell, John C. Reilly and Sacha Baron Cohen at the height of their powers.
  2. Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy (2004) – Stay Classy.  Not much else to say here.
  3. The Other Guys (2010) – The scene where the Rock and Samuel L. Jackson leap from a building is still one of the funniest things I have ever seen.
  4. Step Brothers (2008) – Ferrell and Reilly again in all their monumentally moronic man-child glory.
  5. The Campaign (2012) – Political farce just got Farrelled. Continue reading

My Rage Against Mandatory Reading

Rat in a Cage Lyrics

…reading the books THEY told me to read!

Sure, I’ll never forget reading Elie Wiesel’s Night or Harper Lee’s To Kill a Mockingbird in my sophomore honors English class in high school.  Damn shit changed my life.  Even my mopey, proto-goth, depressed sniveling brat self at the “all-knowing” and “all the world sucks” age of fifteen could see this stuff was da bomb and preaching the truth.

But, damn, the OTHER shit we were forced to read in high school scarred me for me life and left me with a counter-productive psychological aversion to anything labeled as mandatory reading…to the point that it took nearly fifteen years before I got over the mandatory reading stigma and finally devoured Steinbeck’s The Grapes of Wrath (so clearly one of the greatest novels of all time).  However, despite years of literary therapy and my successful relationship with those wrathful wine pellets, I still to this day absolutely REFUSE to read Salinger’s The Catcher in the Rye.  Yes, I still have the nerve to refuse to read Salinger!  S-A-L-I-N-G-E-R!!! (But I might go see that doc about him.)  These classics of mandatory reading somehow slipped through the cracks at my high school, but because they have been mandatory reading for just about every other teen in America over the past sixty odd years, I’ve avoided them unfairly in my adult years.

Why you ask?  Because the following were mandatory reading during my teenage years…and I’ll never forget the pain these books put me through.

Behold, the king of them all, the most egregious piece of mandatory reading I suffered through in my days of delicate youth, a book that almost ruined my love for reading:

Chaim Potok’s The Chosen. Continue reading

Word Up/Word Down v2.0

The new development team.

The new development team.

If I extolled upon you, dear readers, everything I see, say, think or do, you’d probably put a collective hit out on my life (funded through Kickstarter no doubt) to end your misery of being subjected to such insanity.  And let’s be honest, I could tweet about some of it, but sometimes 140 characters is too much!  So our crack team of developers (not to be confused with the former development team on crack) have devised a new recurring feature to capture those things that have fallen through the cracks at The Spin and render them down from tweetable status to pure unadulterated one-word twittery.

Think of them as flash reviews.  Quick Quips.  Free association.  Word Up/Word Down.

So, here we go:

Word Up/Word Down v2.0

  • Netflix original series, Orange is the New Black – Wear
  • HBO Films’ Clear History – Hilarevengious
  • Elysium – Lazy
  • Amy Adams and Jennifer Lawrence in the trailers for American Hustle – Holy or Hotchee
  • Cameron Diaz and Penelope Cruz in the trailer for The Counselor – Moly! or Motchee!
  • Charlie Manuel – Out
  • Ryne Sandberg – In
  • The Philadelphia Phillies’ season – Over
  • The Lobster House in Cape May, NJ – Tradition
  • A Bojangles above the Mason-Dixon Line in Reading, PA – Y’all!
  • Tanger Outlets in Lancaster, PA – Deals!
  • Amish Country – Traffic?

Share your own one word reviews of stuff you’ve recently seen or read or done or ate (or if you’re Southern, done seen or done read or done did or done ate) in the comments field.

Word Up/Word Down v1.0

Too Many Words

I once had an editor tell me my writing was too wordy.

HA!

Well, this is for you then.

There’s not enough time in the world to dive deeply into everything that falls into The Spin, so we’re test driving a potential new recurring feature where I will extol enlightening (or not) one word reviews/thoughts on a myriad of stuff.

Think of them as flash reviews.  Quick Quips.  Free association.  Word Up/Word Down.

So, here we go:

Word Up/Word Down v1.0

Share your own one word reviews of stuff you’ve recently seen or read in the comments field.

And then let us know what you think!

Vice Presidential Debate Drinking Game 2012

Undecided voters…look into my eyes.

Behold!  A young savior of a party – a truth-deficient, budget-crunching, Tea Party-ing whippersnapper from the cheesy state of Wisconsin.

Regard!  An elder statesman – a hot-headed, gaffe-producing, “crazy uncle” to the incumbent President from the sales tax-free state of Delaware.

And for one night only – October 11th, 2012 – they’re duking it out in the home of the Colonel’s eleven herbs and spices – Kentucky, y’all!

A most delightful addition to Your Debate Drinking Games, don’t you think?

Let the Drinking Games continue!

And may the drinks be forever in your favor. Continue reading

Presidential Debate Drinking Games 2012

Hark, Citizens!

On yonder eve the third of October and subsequent eves henceforth totalling thrice, the electorate will listen and watch with bated breath as…

Sir Willard Mittenton T. Romney IV of the Celestial Kingdom debates…

Lord Barackus T. Hussein Obama Jr. of the Incumbency…

…for the opportunity to serve this great nation in the high office of the Presidency.

And regardless of the victor of these great debates…there is but one truth to illuminate the masses…

IT’S TIME TO GET YOUR DRINK ON!

Consider this, dear compatriots in libations, to be a living document.  Provide at will your best suggestions and most opportune and timely rules to be added to the games in the comments section so that we might all partake in drunken sloppiness and hangovers knowing that in our hearts we played the games to their fullest.

So let the Debate Drinking Games begin!

And may the drinks be forever in your favor. Continue reading

State of the Union Drinking Game V. 2012

Seriously, guys, I have to give this speech...now?

 
If I were President Obama, I wouldn’t want to get on national television on Tuesday night.  The more the media focuses on the current Republican Presidential Primaries, the better he looks.  He’s best out of the spotlight right now, but it is his duty…and tradition…so the show must go on at 9pm EST Tuesday, January 24, 2012.
 
Oh, how we’re all enjoying the dog (Santorum) and pony (Romney) and rabid wolf dog (Newt) and radically libertarian anti-war horse (Ron Paul) show that is the Republican primary season.  Heck, I’ve been so wrapped up in the raucous roller-coaster comedy of miss-manners that I have no idea what Obama is going to talk about this year.  Jobs?  Sure.  Gridlock?  Check.  The economy is in the midst of a mild recovery on paper (unemployment slightly down, job creation slight up) but it’s not enough to change the sentiments of the populace who are still feeling the full aches and pains of the recession.   Or maybe he’ll take about the season finale of his favorite TV show, Homeland?  (Seriously, are you watching that show yet?  The season finale was off the chains, yo!) Continue reading

47 Comedies, One Million Laughs

It’s the long overdue return of The Schleicher Spin’s Guest Blogger Series!

The gauntlet was laid down, and guest blogger Nicky D was asked to make a list of the best comedies of all time.

Which of these films will top Nicky D’s list?

Airplane!

Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy

Coming to America

Groundhog Day

Young Frankenstein

Introduction:

Hello, my name is Nicky D and I am the smartest man alive. I work alongside of Mr. Schleicher on an everyday basis. Mr. Schleicher can’t seem to get over the fact of how brilliant of a man I truly am. I have completely annoyed him with the mentioning of my top lists of movies, especially comedies. So he challenged me to come up with a top comedy list, and I came up with a nice uneven number for you to review and comment on. I love movies and not just comedies either. I am into most genres except for romance, family, documentaries, musicals, and westerns. I still do watch them and try to give an honest opinion on them. My favorite actor is Daniel Day Lewis and my favorite movie is The Last of the Mohicans. I have very strong opinions about movies in general, so if you want to have a spirited debate, as I always say, “Bring it On” (not on the list, by the way). There may be some movies that I left off of the list because of the fact that I might not have seen them, but if you mention a movie I will absolutely check it out and respond with my opinion. Thanks to Mr. Schleicher, and have fun with my top 47 comedies all time.

 Parental Guidance Suggested:  Raw, uncensored comedy quotes below. Continue reading

State of the Union Drinking Game V. 2011

President Obama looks over the speech one last time to see if they can fit in any more allusions to Graham Greene or Terrence Malick to make Dave happy.

In the words of Bob Dylan, the times they are a changing.

It’s amazing what the other party regaining power in Congress and one rousing and comforting speech in the wake of a tragedy can do for a guy’s approval ratings.  After quoting everything from the Bible to the trailer for Terrence Malick’s The Tree of Life in his Tuscon Speech (which served as a Hail Mary pass that will be left hanging in the air until 2012), Obama looks to get back down to it with his highly anticipated and much ballyhooed State of the Union speech on Tuesday night, January 25th and 9pm EST.

Gone are the days of crazy-eyed blinking Pelosi, and now sitting next to Biden and his comb-over behind the President will be Sooki-colored blubbering Boehner.  Apparently out on the floor those kooky tea partiers, blue dogs, and bleeding hearts will be mixin’ it up, sittin’ all up in each others’ pieces singin’ kumbaya.  Ah, political theater.  Ain’t it grand?

All eyes will be on the Prez, and there ain’t nuthin’ to do in times likes these but get your drink on. Continue reading